“Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.”
Marcus Aurelius
linkA garden patch or a blog. • RSS • archive
Still partying like it’s 1934.
link“In all affairs it’s a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.”
Bertrand Russell
linkRebranding
Hi there
George speaking
Vice President of Brooding
Here at Broodish Petroleum
If you’re out of the loop
You might know us
As British Petroleum
We’re still BP
But lately
We’ve been doing some
Pretty serious thinking.
linkTrick
le
Down
Gastro
nomics
I
Checked
The weather
Report
On
TV
Before
I
Went
Outside
A
Man
In a tie
Said
“It’s
going
to
trick
le
down.”
So
I
Brought
My
Umbrella
And
Carried
It
All day
All week
Around
3 pm
Wednesday
I
Thought
I
Felt
A
Drop
A
Trick
le
If
You will
But
When
I
Looked
Up
At
The
Power
Line
All
I saw
Was
A
Relieved-
Looking
Pigeon.
linkMy Golden Parachute
Tuesday afternoon
I boarded a flight to Bangalore
With ye olde Board of Directors.
They’re a generally mild and sleepy lot
Most of them really don’t know
The plan.
Everyone is all white hair and business suit
And they really aren’t in any position
To boss around the boss.
But then there we were, all buckled in nice-nice
Drinking spritzers and making the tiny talk
When we hit a spot of turbulence over the Rockies.
Out of nowhere, the oldies start getting this look
And then they all start swarming me like rabid things
Now, it turns out everyone on this goddamn plane is bearing arms.
How they got all those guns onboard
I’ll never know
And they weren’t taking it easy, pointing them all at my occipital lobe.
One of them opened up the door to the whooshing unknown
And the gun barrels prodded me toward the brink
I folded forward out the door.
With my middle fingers high in the air
I knew they couldn’t run the joint without me
Good luck, grams and gramps!
Anyhow, it was lucky I’d had my parachute on me at the time
My wits are always about me
Always thinking! Expecting the unexpected! Prepare! Prepare! Ha HA!
I reached in my suit jacket and I tugged hard on the string
Feeling my body jerk
I looked up, expecting to admire a fluttering expanse of silken parachute.
But instead out came a mushrooming wad of cash
So large
That it works just the same.
I landed on the snowy slopes of Aspen
Where the ski patrol found me
Sleeping quite benevolently on a feathery treasury bed.
My Golden Parachute Pants
This morning
I woke up
And put on my pants.
I don’t have
Too many
Options.
link
